My eyes are swollen, hair messed up, heart broken. All because of 03-13 , just happened to be the birthday of my sister Trina Because it’s on that day , my dad had to go to a meeting ,but I didn’t really care enough to see , if he came home or not .Expecting my daddy to be invincible, it didn’t phase me when he didn’t call all weekend ,even on Sunday, at the weekends end. Neighbors say his car hasn’t been there and the house was the same way I left it. Now when Goddad calls and says “Someone by the name of Doug Higgins has been killed last night” nobody panicked, of all the Doug’s in this world , not my daddy. But just to be sure we check up on him, but he’s not there.No, actually, he’s not anywhere. See what happened was, on Friday night, 117th and Sims, daddy was handling some business, probably collecting some rent. He only told me he was going to a meeting, but I didn’t think he was going to meet Death.I guess I finally see what Tupac seesBecause it seems I’m in a DREAM and death rules everything around me.And I pray to God and ask him why he had to take my daddy, when all my daddy did was praise him. Church three days out of a week, and it’s my daddy that leaves ?So is this just what happens to those that love you, are you mad that I don’t love you too?Daddy, he was a pretty okay guy. He had all the right intentions, and its sad that I have to use past tense. Was, had, used to be, make me realize that he was once here.I won’t get to hear the footsteps, see the smile, hug the big belly, because now there’s a pain in mine. I wake up feeling sick because my daddy didn’t wake me up. 8-12 , My daddy’s birthday, he would be 51 this yearit also happens to be the day my sister’s baby is due. See, my dad, he was the go to guy, But since he had to go bye byeGod thought he had reached his Prime And said that it was his time .Daddy was always the kinda guy, thought he would live for another 50 yearsThought he would at least be a grandpa to one of my kidsAnd my brother, Junior, his only son, he’s the man of the family nowGotta be strong for his family some how Gosh, he’s gone now, wow. I feel like this poem shouldn’t have an ending, this poem is my lifeHis life, our lives without him. Douglas Maurice Higgins, SeniorLived only half a centuryBut through that , he accomplished all of the victoryLiving off nothing but a dream, dreams he hoped to be realityTo 10 of us, he was known as “daddy” , even the grandkidsHe was the only one that directed them to succeed through their school yearsAnd then there’s me, High school Junior, graduating without himI feel like that’s the biggest service I can give himHe always said I would go to Harvard , get into big businessI know we didn’t agree most of the time, we almost never saw eye to eyeBut you know what, you are my daddy, we’re not supposed toI know you were doing everything for me, not for youAnd I’m sorry daddy, I know I’m not supposed to cryI’m supposed to continue living as if you were aliveBut it’s hard to know that you’re no longer by my sideAnd just saying that, hurts me insideThis pain that I feel is comparable to nothing But you knew through Christ you could do all thingsBut come on dad, I know you’re tough, you should have lived through thisThey took you off life support without contacting any of usQuestions, I want to know if you were taken care ofOr if you were left to die there, alone, cold. Who could have done this to you, daddy Is this true daddy This poem is through I love you Daddy.
Written by Vaughan Elyse Butler Higgins Fiddmont for her father...
R.I.P. Mr. Higgins. I know you must be proud of your daughter, I promise to take care of her.
